What If
Directed by: Michael Dowse
Written by: Elan Mastai - based on the play "Toothpaste and Cigars" by T.J. Dawe & Michael Rinaldi
Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Zoe Kazan, Megan Park, Adam Driver, Mackenzie Davis, Rafe Spall, Lucius Hoyos, Jemima Rooper
Comedy/Drama/Romance - 102 min
Written by: Elan Mastai - based on the play "Toothpaste and Cigars" by T.J. Dawe & Michael Rinaldi
Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Zoe Kazan, Megan Park, Adam Driver, Mackenzie Davis, Rafe Spall, Lucius Hoyos, Jemima Rooper
Comedy/Drama/Romance - 102 min

I thought When Harry Met Sally ended for once and for all whether or not men and women could be friends. Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan examined the question so well from so many angles no further films are required to broach the topic again. Well, What If is here to reexamine the issue for any millenials who may have missed it the first time around. Like most imitations, it leaves a stale taste and a something is not quite right feeling. It may not be fair to compare What If to one of the greatest romantic comedies ever made, but they overlap on a lot of similar territory; it is hard to not place them side by side. Unfortunately, when you do that, What If does not look very good.
The most important part of connecting with your future significant other and romantic relationships in general is timing. Preferably, you are both single but you still have to meet at the same place at the same time. If there really is one perfect person for you in this entire world, can you honestly imagine the amount of luck and coincidences which must occur for you two to bump into each other? Wallace (Daniel Radcliffe) meets Chantry (Zoe Kazan) at a party. It is a clumsy meet cute as they rearrange refrigerator words; his are cynical and wary of love, hers are cheeky and humorous.
The most important part of connecting with your future significant other and romantic relationships in general is timing. Preferably, you are both single but you still have to meet at the same place at the same time. If there really is one perfect person for you in this entire world, can you honestly imagine the amount of luck and coincidences which must occur for you two to bump into each other? Wallace (Daniel Radcliffe) meets Chantry (Zoe Kazan) at a party. It is a clumsy meet cute as they rearrange refrigerator words; his are cynical and wary of love, hers are cheeky and humorous.

I offer that Chantry is not as innocent and honest as she comes off however. After hours of chatting up and flirting with Wallace, Chantry finally drops the bomb that she has a long time boyfriend of five years as she writes down her number for Wallace to call her. I have been out of the dating scene for a number of years now but is this sort of behavior no longer out of bounds? The pair decides to become platonic friends but aside from the more than obvious set up that Wallace will inevitably want to advance beyond the platonic stage, many of Chantry’s decisions and situations lead the audience to suspect an unreliable protagonist.

What If is a bit different from the standard rom/com because most of the story is told from the point of view of the guy. Also, in the role normally staffed by a quirky female is Wallace’s best friend, Allan (Adam Driver, 2013's Inside Llewyn Davis), who is obnoxiously loud and opinionated. Allan scores the best line in the film though concerning eating nachos after relations. After the first hour or so of enduring Wallace’s pining, the audience sympathizes with Allan, either tell Chantry how you feel already or just move on. This should I or shouldn’t I dilemma is more tedious than frustrating.

Not very many folks want to see the nicest and most morose guy ever yearn after a girl who, whether she admits it to herself or not, leads him on. Wallace lives in his sister’s attic and sits on the roof moaning about his ex-girlfriend. She cheated on him which instilled in Wallace the strict prohibition on ever being a cheater, this includes trying to break up another couple. Zoe’s boyfriend, Ben (Rafe Spall, 2013's The World's End), is not a bad guy so we are not rooting too hard for this couple to split up so Wallace can move on in.

What If does not give us very much to root for. Based on the play, Toothpaste and Cigars, What If is actually known as The F Word in the rest of the world, but The F Word was a bit too risqué for the MPAA censors to let slide, so we get the vague and forgettable What If instead. Back in 1989 after When Harry Met Sally was released, a studio exec probably said, "What if we make a sequel or another rom/com similar to this one?" His partners told him that was not a good idea; too bad that advice did not filter down to 2014.
Comment Box is loading comments...