Vampire Academy
Directed by: Mark Waters
Written by: Daniel Waters, based on the novel by Richelle Mead
Starring: Zoey Deutch, Lucy Fry, Danila Kozlovsky, Gabriel Byrne, Dominic Sherwood, Olga Kurylenko, Sarah Hyland, Cameron Monaghan, Sami Gayle, Ashley Charles, Claire Foy, Joely Richardson, Dominique Tipper
Action/Comedy/Fantasy/Horror/Mystery - 104 min
Written by: Daniel Waters, based on the novel by Richelle Mead
Starring: Zoey Deutch, Lucy Fry, Danila Kozlovsky, Gabriel Byrne, Dominic Sherwood, Olga Kurylenko, Sarah Hyland, Cameron Monaghan, Sami Gayle, Ashley Charles, Claire Foy, Joely Richardson, Dominique Tipper
Action/Comedy/Fantasy/Horror/Mystery - 104 min

Vampire Academy makes fun of the Twilight series a little bit but what it should do is wear a neon sign pointing out that it is just a rip-off of the teen vampire shtick. From the director of Mean Girls and the writer of Heathers, we get vampires in high school hell with the corresponding truckload of hormones. Cliques, prom, snarky gossip, and of course, a whole lot of blood is just what was lacking in the crowded movie market for the undead.
Based on a series of young adult books by Richelle Mead, the movie spends a lot of time explaining how things work to the audience. Through voiceover and frequent conversations between lead characters who should not have to have such basic dialogue about how vampires live and get along in the world, we learn their rules and classifications.
We are at a vampire academy in the middle of nowhere Montana. There are different classes of vampire, some more pure than others, some who act mostly human, and some truly wicked bloodthirsty killers. Rose Hathaway (Zoey Deutch) is a half human/half vampire. She is in training to become Lissa Dragomir’s (Lucy Fry) bodyguard and sworn protector. Lissa is considered vampire royalty and is somewhere in line to become the next vampire queen.
Life at the vampire academy can be dangerous. Petty jealousy and bullying take the form of vandalism, threatening messages written in blood on the wall, and dead animal carcasses hanging from ropes warning of certain doom. Whatever happened to slap fights and hair pulling? Something more is going on here at the academy than just teen drama and Rose and Lissa are going to have be the best Nancy Drews they can be to get to the bottom of it all. Also, I wonder if it will all come to a head on prom night? Vampire Academy wouldn’t dare be as blatant as that right?
Despite the deluge, there is still room in Hollywood for vampires. When done right, the vampire tale can entertain (Interview with the Vampire, Blade). Unfortunately, far too many films abuse these characters and use them to make a cheap buck (Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Kiss of the Damned, Priest).
The teenage supernatural film is on life support however. The witches in Beautiful Creatures were ok but Percy Jackson and the Mortal Instruments do not even approach the angst of Edward Scissorhands. Set in an isolated boarding school, Vampire Academy contains more than a dash of Harry Potter, but if Harry and Hermione had lines like these, even the Harry Potter fanatics would roll their eyes. Lissa delivers what may be considered the worst final speech in the long history of wrap-it-all-up speeches.
Vampire Academy’s students are a livelier bunch than the drugged-up Twilight zombies but they are stuffed full of teenage snark and he loves me/he loves me not romantic absurdity. Showing its ambitions to become a franchise, the film sets itself up for a sequel, but there is no way it is going to earn near enough money at the box office to fund another one of these stories.
Based on a series of young adult books by Richelle Mead, the movie spends a lot of time explaining how things work to the audience. Through voiceover and frequent conversations between lead characters who should not have to have such basic dialogue about how vampires live and get along in the world, we learn their rules and classifications.
We are at a vampire academy in the middle of nowhere Montana. There are different classes of vampire, some more pure than others, some who act mostly human, and some truly wicked bloodthirsty killers. Rose Hathaway (Zoey Deutch) is a half human/half vampire. She is in training to become Lissa Dragomir’s (Lucy Fry) bodyguard and sworn protector. Lissa is considered vampire royalty and is somewhere in line to become the next vampire queen.
Life at the vampire academy can be dangerous. Petty jealousy and bullying take the form of vandalism, threatening messages written in blood on the wall, and dead animal carcasses hanging from ropes warning of certain doom. Whatever happened to slap fights and hair pulling? Something more is going on here at the academy than just teen drama and Rose and Lissa are going to have be the best Nancy Drews they can be to get to the bottom of it all. Also, I wonder if it will all come to a head on prom night? Vampire Academy wouldn’t dare be as blatant as that right?
Despite the deluge, there is still room in Hollywood for vampires. When done right, the vampire tale can entertain (Interview with the Vampire, Blade). Unfortunately, far too many films abuse these characters and use them to make a cheap buck (Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Kiss of the Damned, Priest).
The teenage supernatural film is on life support however. The witches in Beautiful Creatures were ok but Percy Jackson and the Mortal Instruments do not even approach the angst of Edward Scissorhands. Set in an isolated boarding school, Vampire Academy contains more than a dash of Harry Potter, but if Harry and Hermione had lines like these, even the Harry Potter fanatics would roll their eyes. Lissa delivers what may be considered the worst final speech in the long history of wrap-it-all-up speeches.
Vampire Academy’s students are a livelier bunch than the drugged-up Twilight zombies but they are stuffed full of teenage snark and he loves me/he loves me not romantic absurdity. Showing its ambitions to become a franchise, the film sets itself up for a sequel, but there is no way it is going to earn near enough money at the box office to fund another one of these stories.
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