The Expendables 3
Directed by: Patrick Hughes
Written by: Sylvester Stallone and Creighton Rothenberger & Katrin Benedikt - story by Sylvester Stallone - characters by Dave Callaham
Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Antonio Banderas, Jet Li, Wesley Snipes, Dolph Lundgren, Kelsey Grammer, Randy Couture, Terry Crews, Kellan Lutz, Ronda Rousey, Glen Powell, Victor Ortiz, Robert Davi, Mel Gibson, Harrison Ford, Arnold Schwarzenegger
Action/Adventure/Thriller - 126 min
Written by: Sylvester Stallone and Creighton Rothenberger & Katrin Benedikt - story by Sylvester Stallone - characters by Dave Callaham
Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Antonio Banderas, Jet Li, Wesley Snipes, Dolph Lundgren, Kelsey Grammer, Randy Couture, Terry Crews, Kellan Lutz, Ronda Rousey, Glen Powell, Victor Ortiz, Robert Davi, Mel Gibson, Harrison Ford, Arnold Schwarzenegger
Action/Adventure/Thriller - 126 min
The Expendables formula is now as familiar to audiences as the Rocky and Rambo formulas. You know exactly what you’re in for. For some ‘80s action movie fans, everything about The Expendables 3 will be music to their ears; for others, it will be cliché-infested nonsense. Reading the cast list should be the sole arbiter on whether or not you will spend money to see the latest iteration of masculine menopause, of former A-list stars reciting B-movie lines and hamming it up for over the top self-parody.
You already know Sly Stallone, Schwarzenegger, and Dolph Lundgren are Expendable regulars; well how about Harrison Ford, Wesley Snipes, Mel Gibson, Antonio Banderas, and maybe one or two other names I will not divulge. I am very happy to see some of these actors again. Wesley Snipes and Mel Gibson are Hollywood poison due to their off screen issues, but every time Snipes pops up, I smile and think of Willie Mays Hayes from Major League (1989).
You already know Sly Stallone, Schwarzenegger, and Dolph Lundgren are Expendable regulars; well how about Harrison Ford, Wesley Snipes, Mel Gibson, Antonio Banderas, and maybe one or two other names I will not divulge. I am very happy to see some of these actors again. Wesley Snipes and Mel Gibson are Hollywood poison due to their off screen issues, but every time Snipes pops up, I smile and think of Willie Mays Hayes from Major League (1989).
That is the point of the Expendables franchise. Very few people actually care or will ever remember anything about the story lines. They will stand in line to see action stars they used to love a few decades ago. I shook my head more than a few times at the ridiculous plot, but I completely understand the allure of getting all of these guys together in the same room. The biggest problem for Stallone, the film’s writer and main actor, is that he has one-on-one scenes with Harrison Ford and Mel Gibson. Both of these gentlemen noticeably make Sylvester look like an awful actor. Ford and Gibson take their roles seriously and routinely make Stallone look third rate. When it is just Terry Crews or Randy Couture sharing the scene, the audience does not notice the talent mismatch as much.
After a hard opening involving a helicopter, an out of control train, and an anti-aircraft artillery piece, The Expendables 3 shows its hand; this will be about old school versus new school. Stallone’s Barney Ross fires his old crew; he could not live with the consequences if one of them died on the next mission impossible. He hires a new and much younger crew of hot heads and sociopaths. These guys more or less blend together, except for female MMA star Ronda Rousey, but it's intriguing to see the old heads used to charging through the front door be confronted with new gee whiz gadgets and stealthy maneuvers.
The Expendables 3 has more than its fair share of nonsense. Among a very long list of “no ways,” I believe the biggest unbelievable event is outrunning and dodging a proximity close 1000-pound high explosive bomb launched from the underside of a helicopter. There are a hundred other head shakers, but this one is especially egregious. However, the final battle is a thumbs up adrenaline-fuelled good time. There are tanks, a couple hundred nameless and faceless bad guys, bazookas, throwing knives, hand-to-hand combat, and every combination of a way to kill someone you can imagine. The entire idea behind The Expendables is ridiculous, but I challenge you not to enjoy the heck out of the climax.
The awful puns are still here, the obvious set-ups to get the stars to say their most famous movie lines are still here, and the bad acting surrounds the entire movie. Yet, I did not walk out of the theater disliking the film as I did from The Expendables 2. The villain is more effective, the stunts are a notch higher, and the nostalgia factor from long lost action stars is increased. I am still not recommending The Expendables 3, there are better uses of your time in the multiplex than this film, but I understand if you wander in for this guilty pleasure.
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