Minions
Directed by: Kyle Balda & Pierre Coffin
Written by: Brian Lynch
Voices by: Sandra Bullock, Jon Hamm, Michael Keaton, Allison Janney, Steve Coogan, Jennifer Saunders, Geoffrey Rush
Animation/Comedy/Family - 91 min Reviewed by Charlie Juhl on 8 July 2015
Written by: Brian Lynch
Voices by: Sandra Bullock, Jon Hamm, Michael Keaton, Allison Janney, Steve Coogan, Jennifer Saunders, Geoffrey Rush
Animation/Comedy/Family - 91 min Reviewed by Charlie Juhl on 8 July 2015
Sidekicks are sidekicks for a reason; they operate more effectively in the background. They may steal a scene or two from the main character, but that’s it, back to the lab or underground lair with you. Even though we are up to seven Batman films now, there has never been one with just Robin. No matter how many iterations of Frankenstein’s monster we get, it will also be Dr. Frankenstein above the title and not Igor. Willy Wonka’s Oompa Loompas, perhaps the closest kin to whatever the minions are, will never headline their own film. Such should be the case with the minions, they are perfect as brief comic relief away from Despicable Me’s Gru; they cannot carry their own film.
Minions is an origin story answering a question nobody asked, “Where the heck did those minions come from?” Who cares? The lack of motivation to answer this question reflects how difficult it is to pick the proper demographic Minions is primed for. Minions feels like it is for the wee folk; pre-teens are a bit too old to laugh at the non-stop incomprehensible gibberish flowing from what one British newscaster calls them, “bald, jaundiced children.” However, the single digit kids will understand none of the dozen or so pop culture jokes aimed at their parents.
Minions is an origin story answering a question nobody asked, “Where the heck did those minions come from?” Who cares? The lack of motivation to answer this question reflects how difficult it is to pick the proper demographic Minions is primed for. Minions feels like it is for the wee folk; pre-teens are a bit too old to laugh at the non-stop incomprehensible gibberish flowing from what one British newscaster calls them, “bald, jaundiced children.” However, the single digit kids will understand none of the dozen or so pop culture jokes aimed at their parents.
The minions have a very long history. They evolved with the single-celled organisms, morphed into fish, crawled out onto land with the dinosaurs, interacted with cavemen, and even fought for Napoleon. Their raison d’etre is to serve the biggest, baddest, evilest villain they can find. Unfortunately, the clumsy minions also have a knack for getting their bosses killed; hence why they find themselves frequently unemployed. 90% of the film takes place in 1968, a year ripe for pop culture asides, but all of which are going to sail right over your child’s head while you chuckle at the Andy Warhol, Abbey Road, and fake moon landing jokes.
Our three main minions, Kevin, Stuart, and Bob, bravely leave the main pack to find a new super villain boss. They end up in Orlando at Villain Con, a sort of Comic-Con rip-off for bad guys, and fall head over heels for Scarlett Overkill (Sandra Bullock, 2013’s Gravity). Scarlett is the new face on the villain scene and has her eyes set on the British crown jewels. Her husband, Herb Overkill (Jon Hamm), is her foppish technology guru. They employ the minions to steal the crown jewels for them, but in true minion fashion, they make a complete mess of things, and all of a sudden Bob is the new King of England.
For you parents out there who have no choice but to escort your summer vacationing children to this thing, just hang out for the 1968 jokes. Everything else will just annoy and bore you. For you kids, don’t interrupt those around you asking your parents why everyone is chuckling, just laugh at the next fart joke. There appears to be just enough things for everyone in the crowd, but it feels like a whole lot of nothing. Michael Keaton, Allison Janney, and Steve Coogen all voice ancillary characters who are as soon off screen as they are on it so we get that much more minion nonsense.
Pinning down the minion vernacular may be a way to pass the time before this 90 minute film lets you get the heck out of the theater. I heard a lot of Italian, some Spanish, some French, and some say there is Bahasa Indonesian sprinkled in. Audiences were not wrong in thinking the minions were the best parts of the two Despicable Me films. We only saw them every now and again and when we did, we laughed. This is not an indicator to make an entire film about them. George Lucas made two films about the Ewoks and he does his best to bury even the mere mention of them now. Minions may never achieve Ewok movie level of infamy, but when you are being compared to Ewoks, something is wrong.
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