Citizen Charlie
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  • 2021 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • French Exit
      • Summer of Soul (...Or, When the Revolution Could Not Be Televised)
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • CODA
      • Cruella
      • Judas and the Black Messiah
      • LFG
      • Nobody
    • 3 Stars >
      • Black Widow
      • Bliss
      • The Boss Baby: Family Business
      • Candyman
      • Jungle Cruise
      • Land
      • Malcolm & Marie
      • The Mauritanian
      • P!nk: All I Know So Far
      • The United States vs. Billie Holiday
      • Without Remorse
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • Annette
      • The Boy from Medellín
      • Chaos Walking
      • The Courier
      • Dear Evan Hansen
      • The Forever Purge
      • Gunpowder Milkshake
      • Lamb
      • The Little Things
      • Old
      • Wrath of Man
    • 2 Stars >
      • City of Lies
      • Coming 2 America
      • Final Account
      • The Night House
      • Profile
      • Raya and the Last Dragon
      • Supernova
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • The Marksman
      • Silk Road
    • 1 Star >
      • Mortal Kombat
      • Outside the Wire
  • Cinema Clash Podcast
  • 2020 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • The Outpost
      • Promising Young Woman
      • The Vast of Night
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • The Assistant
      • The Burnt Orange Heresy
      • The Climb
      • Da 5 Bloods
      • Extra Ordinary
      • First Cow
      • The Gentlemen
      • The Hunt
      • I'm Thinking of Ending Things
      • John Lewis: Good Trouble
      • Never Rarely Sometimes Always
      • One Night in Miami
      • Sound of Metal
    • 3 Stars >
      • Borat Subsequent Moviefilm
      • Chemical Hearts
      • Deerskin
      • EMMA.
      • Kajillionaire
      • The Midnight Sky
      • News of the World
      • The Old Guard
      • Olympic Dreams
      • Premature
      • The Prom
      • The Social Dilemma
      • Sputnik
      • The Trip to Greece
      • The Twentieth Century
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • Bill & Ted Face the Music
      • Enola Holmes
      • Herself
      • How to Build a Girl
      • Tesla
      • True History of the Kelly Gang
      • Vivarium
      • We Are Little Zombies
      • The White Tiger
    • 2 Stars >
      • Blow the Man Down
      • Come Away
      • Come Play
      • Greed
      • Greenland
      • Irresistible
      • Let Him Go
      • Lucky Grandma
      • My Spy
      • Project Power
      • Radioactive
      • The Rhythm Section
      • Save Yourselves!
      • The Traitor (Il Traditore)
      • Wild Mountain Thyme
      • Yes, God, Yes
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • Bad Boys for Life
      • Butt Boy
      • The High Note
      • Selah and the Spades
      • Underwater
      • The War with Grandpa
      • Wonder Woman 1984
    • 1 Star >
      • Honest Thief
  • 2019 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • 1917
      • A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood
      • For Sama
      • Jojo Rabbit
      • Once Upon a Time ... in Hollywood
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • Alita: Battle Angel
      • Blinded by the Light
      • Booksmart
      • John Wick: Chapter 3 - Parabellum
      • Joker
      • Knives Out
      • Midnight Traveler
      • Mike Wallace Is Here
      • Transit
      • Waves
      • Wild Nights with Emily
    • 3 Stars >
      • Ash is the Purest White
      • Avengers: Endgame
      • Bombshell
      • Brittany Runs A Marathon
      • Captain Marvel
      • The Dead Don't Die
      • Frozen II
      • Gloria Bell
      • Good Boys
      • The Hummingbird Project
      • The Kid Who Would Be King
      • Knock Down the House
      • Meeting Gorbachev
      • Queen & Slim
      • Ready or Not
      • The Report
      • Rocketman
      • Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker
      • Teen Spirit
      • Us
      • Velvet Buzzsaw
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • All Is True
      • Charlie's Angels
      • Downton Abbey
      • How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World
      • Hustlers
      • It Chapter Two
      • The LEGO Movie 2: The Second Part
      • The Lion King
      • Long Day's Journey Into Night
      • Non-Fiction
      • Official Secrets
      • The Peanut Butter Falcon
      • Richard Jewell
      • Shazam!
      • Stan & Ollie
      • Uncut Gems
      • The Upside
      • Where's My Roy Cohn?
      • Wonder Park
      • Yesterday
    • 2 Stars >
      • The Art of Racing in the Rain
      • Dark Phoenix
      • Dora and the Lost City of Gold
      • Frankie
      • Glass
      • Isn't It Romantic
      • Midway
      • Red Joan
      • Spider-Man: Far From Home
      • What Men Want
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • The Aeronauts
      • Angel Has Fallen
      • Dumbo
      • Gemini Man
      • The Goldfinch
      • The Kitchen
      • Pokémon Detective Pikachu
      • Serenity
      • Terminator: Dark Fate
    • 1 Star >
      • Men in Black: International
      • Miss Bala
      • Stuber
    • 0.5 Stars >
      • Happy Death Day 2U
  • 2018 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • The Ballad of Buster Scruggs
      • Burning
      • The Death of Stalin
      • The Favourite
      • Isle of Dogs
      • The King
      • Roma
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • American Animals
      • Avengers: Infinity War
      • Blaze
      • Boy Erased
      • Eighth Grade
      • The Endless
      • First Man
      • Green Book
      • Hostiles
      • The Insult
      • Mom and Dad
      • Puzzle
      • RBG
      • Ready Player One
      • Skate Kitchen
      • Sorry to Bother You
      • A Star Is Born
      • Vox Lux
    • 3 Stars >
      • Annihilation
      • Black Panther
      • Bumblebee
      • Deadpool 2
      • Eating Animals
      • Flower
      • Godard Mon Amour
      • The House with a Clock in Its Walls
      • Journey's End
      • Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again
      • Mission: Impossible - Fallout
      • Paddington 2
      • The Price of Everything
      • Red Sparrow
      • The Rider
      • The Seagull
      • Support the Girls
      • Venom
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • Aquaman
      • Bohemian Rhapsody
      • Creed II
      • Game Night
      • The Gospel According to André
      • Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation
      • Mary Poppins Returns
      • Mile 22
      • Operation Finale
      • The Party
      • Peter Rabbit
      • Scotty and the Secret History of Hollywood
      • Sicario: Day of the Soldado
      • A Simple Favor
      • Solo: A Star Wars Story
      • The Spy Who Dumped Me
      • Wildlife
    • 2 Stars >
      • Ant-Man and the Wasp
      • Ben Is Back
      • Blockers
      • Book Club
      • Christopher Robin
      • Damsel
      • Death Wish
      • Early Man
      • The Equalizer 2
      • Film Stars Don't Die in Liverpool
      • Generation Wealth
      • Halloween
      • Measure of a Man
      • The Meg
      • A Midsummer Night's Dream
      • Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle
      • Ocean's 8
      • Peppermint
      • Tomb Raider
      • A Wrinkle in Time
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • The Commuter
      • Detective Dee: The Four Heavenly Kings
      • Fifty Shades Freed
      • Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom
      • Maze Runner: The Death Cure
      • The Predator
    • 1 Star >
      • Gauguin: Voyage to Tahiti
      • The Happytime Murders
      • Night School
    • 0.5 Stars >
      • Born Guilty
      • Kin
      • Show Dogs
  • 2017 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • Blade Runner 2049
      • Dunkirk
      • Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri
      • Wind River
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • Columbus
      • Detroit
      • Donald Cried
      • Faces Places (Visages, villages)
      • Frantz
      • Get Out
      • I, Tonya
      • An Inconvenient Sequel: Truth to Power
      • It
      • Okja
      • The Shape of Water
      • Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets
    • 3 Stars >
      • Abacus: Small Enough to Jail
      • Atomic Blonde
      • Baby Driver
      • The Big Sick
      • Cars 3
      • The Fencer
      • Finding Oscar
      • The Florida Project
      • Girls Trip
      • The Greatest Showman
      • Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2
      • Jeremiah Tower: The Last Magnificent
      • The LEGO Batman Movie
      • Logan Lucky
      • Marshall
      • Novitiate
      • Personal Shopper
      • RAW
      • School Life
      • Split
      • Star Wars: The Last Jedi
      • Thelma
      • Thor: Ragnarok
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • Battle of the Sexes
      • The Boss Baby
      • Breathe
      • A Cure for Wellness
      • Dolores
      • Ferdinand
      • The Great Wall
      • John Wick Chapter 2
      • Justice League
      • King Arthur: Legend of the Sword
      • Lady Bird
      • Landline
      • Last Flag Flying
      • Rebel in the Rye
      • Victoria and Abdul
      • Wonder Woman
      • The Zookeeper's Wife
    • 2 Stars >
      • Beauty and the Beast
      • The Dark Tower
      • A Dog's Purpose
      • Gifted
      • Gold
      • Home Again
      • Ingrid Goes West
      • The Last Word
      • Leap!
      • Logan
      • The Lost City of Z
      • The Mummy
      • Paris Can Wait
      • Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales
      • Rock Dog
      • Song to Song
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • Before I Fall
      • Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie
      • The Dinner
      • Everything, Everything
      • The Fate of the Furious
      • Fifty Shades Darker
      • Happy Death Day
      • It Comes at Night
      • Snatched
      • Suburbicon
      • Wish Upon
    • 1 Star >
      • Rings
      • The Space Between Us
      • xXx: Return of Xander Cage
    • 0.5 Stars >
      • Buster's Mal Heart
  • 2016 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • Captain Fantastic
      • Hell or High Water
      • I Am Not Your Negro
      • Jackie
      • Krisha
      • La La Land
      • A Monster Calls
      • Paterson
      • Silence
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • The Accountant
      • Cameraperson
      • Deadpool
      • Embrace of the Serpent
      • Finding Dory
      • Hail, Caesar!
      • Miss Sloane
      • Moonlight
      • Nocturnal Animals
      • Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
    • 3 Stars >
      • Allied
      • Arrival
      • Author: The JT LeRoy Story
      • The Birth of a Nation
      • The Conjuring 2
      • Creative Control
      • Doctor Strange
      • The Eagle Huntress
      • The Edge of Seventeen
      • Eye in the Sky
      • The First Monday in May
      • Green Room
      • Hacksaw Ridge
      • Ixcanul
      • The Jungle Book
      • Keanu
      • Live by Night
      • Lo and Behold, Reveries of the Connected World
      • The Magnificent Seven
      • Miles Ahead
      • Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children
      • A Monster with a Thousand Heads
      • The Nice Guys
      • Passengers
      • Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
      • Star Trek Beyond
      • Sully
      • War Dogs
      • Wiener-Dog
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • Café Society
      • Captain America: Civil War
      • Christine
      • The Clan
      • Deepwater Horizon
      • Eddie the Eagle
      • Equals
      • The Girl on the Train
      • High-Rise
      • The Infiltrator
      • Knight of Cups
      • Kubo and the Two Strings
      • Lion
      • Little Men
      • London Has Fallen
      • Louder Than Bombs
      • Morris from America
      • Pete's Dragon
      • Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping
      • Queen of Katwe
      • Race
      • Southside With You
      • Storks
      • Sunset Song
      • Trolls
      • Warcraft
      • Zootopia
    • 2 Stars >
      • Alice Through the Looking Glass
      • American Pastoral
      • Bad Moms
      • The BFG
      • Blair Witch
      • The Choice
      • Dough
      • Everybody Wants Some!!
      • The Finest Hours
      • The Legend of Tarzan
      • The Light Between Oceans
      • The Secret Life of Pets
      • Suicide Squad
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • The 5th Wave
      • Allegiant
      • Angry Birds
      • Bad Santa 2
      • The Boss
      • Central Intelligence
      • Ghostbusters
      • How to Be Single
      • The Huntsman: Winter's War
      • Ip Man 3
      • Zoolander 2
    • 1 Star >
      • Gods of Egypt
      • Ice Age: Collision Course
      • My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2
      • Now You See Me 2
      • Ratchet & Clank
      • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows
    • 0.5 Stars >
      • Ben-Hur
      • Norm of the North
      • Ride Along 2
  • 2015 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • The Big Short
      • Ex Machina
      • Jafar Panahi's Taxi
      • Steve Jobs
      • The Tribe
      • While We're Young
      • Youth
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • Best of Enemies
      • Bridge of Spies
      • Brooklyn
      • Clouds of Sils Maria
      • Concussion
      • The End of the Tour
      • The Hateful Eight
      • Inside Out
      • It Follows
      • Mad Max: Fury Road
      • The Man from U.N.C.L.E.
      • The Martian
      • Mistress America
      • The Revenant
      • Room
      • Shaun the Sheep Movie
      • Sisters
      • Spotlight
      • Star Wars: The Force Awakens
      • Straight Outta Compton
      • Truth
    • 3 Stars >
      • The Age of Adaline
      • Avengers: Age of Ultron
      • Black Mass
      • Carol
      • The Cut
      • Entourage
      • Fresh Dressed
      • The Good Dinosaur
      • Grandma
      • James White
      • Janis: Little Girl Blue
      • Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet
      • McFarland, USA
      • Me and Earl and the Dying Girl
      • Merchants of Doubt
      • MERU
      • Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation
      • Mustang
      • Pan
      • The Peanuts Movie
      • Pitch Perfect 2
      • Pixels
      • San Andreas
      • The Second Mother
      • Son of Saul
      • Spectre
      • Trainwreck
      • We Are Your Friends
      • Woman in Gold
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • American Ultra
      • Anomalisa
      • Ant-Man
      • The Assassin
      • The Black Panthers: Vanguard of the Revolution
      • Boulevard
      • Crimson Peak
      • The Danish Girl
      • Far from the Madding Crowd
      • Finders Keepers
      • Furious 7
      • The Gunman
      • Hippocrates: Diary of a French Doctor
      • In the Heart of the Sea
      • Jurassic World
      • Kingsman: The Secret Service
      • Listen to Me Marlon
      • Macbeth
      • The New Rijksmuseum
      • No Escape
      • Spy
      • The Visit
      • A Walk in the Woods
      • The Water Diviner
      • The Wolfpack
    • 2 Stars >
      • The 33
      • Aloft
      • Black Sea
      • Do I Sound Gay?
      • Fifty Shades of Grey
      • Focus
      • Freeheld
      • Get Hard
      • The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 2
      • Joy
      • Minions
      • Mississippi Grind
      • The Night Before
      • The Salvation
      • The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
      • Seventh Son
      • Terminator Genisys
      • Tomorrowland
      • True Story
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • Chappie
      • Desert Dancer
      • Hot Tub Time Machine 2
      • The Divergent Series: Insurgent
      • Jupiter Ascending
      • Maggie
      • Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials
      • Run All Night
      • Ted 2
      • Vacation
    • 1 Star >
      • The Lazarus Effect
      • Magic Mike XXL
      • The Transporter Refueled
    • 0.5 Stars >
      • The Gallows
  • 2014 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • Calvary
      • A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night
      • Inherent Vice
      • The LEGO Movie
      • Life Itself
      • A Most Violent Year
      • Mr. Turner
      • The Theory of Everything
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • American Sniper
      • Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)
      • The Boxtrolls
      • Boyhood
      • The Equalizer
      • Fury
      • Gone Girl
      • Guardians of the Galaxy
      • The Imitation Game
      • Like Father, Like Son
      • Mommy
      • Nymphomaniac: Vol. I
      • Particle Fever
      • Selma
      • Top Five
      • Whiplash
    • 3 Stars >
      • 22 Jump Street
      • Alive Inside
      • Beside Still Waters
      • The Book of Life
      • Captain America: The Winter Soldier
      • The Disappearance of Eleanor Rigby: THEM
      • Draft Day
      • Edge of Tomorrow
      • Get on Up
      • Godzilla
      • The Grand Budapest Hotel
      • The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies
      • I Am Ali
      • The Judge
      • Kill the Messenger
      • Locke
      • Love Is Strange
      • Nas: Time Is Illmatic
      • Night Moves
      • The November Man
      • The One I Love
      • The Overnighters
      • The Raid 2
      • Rosewater
      • Sin City: A Dame to Kill For
      • St. Vincent
      • Still Alice
      • Supermensch: The Legend of Shep Gordon
      • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
      • Two Days, One Night
      • Unbroken
      • Under the Skin
      • Wild
      • X-Men: Days of Future Past
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • 3 Days to Kill
      • About Last Night
      • Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
      • Art and Craft
      • As Above, So Below
      • Begin Again
      • Blood Ties
      • Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
      • Divergent
      • The Expendables 3
      • Fading Gigolo
      • Foxcatcher
      • The Giver
      • The Grand Seduction
      • Horns
      • Horrible Bosses 2
      • The Hundred-Foot Journey
      • Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit
      • Jersey Boys
      • Listen Up Philip
      • Magic in the Moonlight
      • The Maze Runner
      • Men, Women & Children
      • A Million Ways to Die in the West
      • The Monuments Men
      • Mr. Peabody & Sherman
      • Muppets Most Wanted
      • Need for Speed
      • Non-Stop
      • Point and Shoot
      • RoboCop
      • Tracks
      • Transcendence
      • Veronica Mars
      • Winter's Tale
    • 2 Stars >
      • 300: Rise of an Empire
      • Alan Partridge
      • The Amazing Spider-Man 2
      • The Art of the Steal
      • Big Hero 6
      • Blended
      • Exodus: Gods and Kings
      • The French Minister
      • Hellion
      • The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 1
      • Into the Storm
      • Into the Woods
      • John Wick
      • Laggies
      • Land Ho!
      • A Long Way Down
      • Lucy
      • Maleficent
      • Neighbors
      • Noah
      • The Nut Job
      • Oculus
      • Rio 2
      • That Awkward Moment
      • What If
      • When the Game Stands Tall
      • Wish I Was Here
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • Big Eyes
      • The Fault in Our Stars
      • I, Frankenstein
      • Pompeii
      • Transformers: Age of Extinction
    • 1 Star >
      • Brick Mansions
      • The Identical
      • Ride Along
      • Son of God
      • Tusk
      • Vampire Academy
    • 0.5 Stars >
      • Left Behind
      • The Legend of Hercules
      • Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones
    • Zero Stars >
      • A Haunted House 2
  • 2013 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • 12 Years A Slave
      • Frances Ha
      • The Gatekeepers
      • Gravity
      • Her
      • Lone Survivor
      • Much Ado About Nothing
      • Stoker
      • We Steal Secrets: The Story of Wikileaks
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • All Is Lost
      • August: Osage County
      • Before Midnight
      • The Bling Ring
      • Captain Phillips
      • Fruitvale Station
      • God Loves Uganda
      • The Great Beauty
      • Inside Llewyn Davis
      • The Patience Stone
      • The Wolf of Wall Street
      • You're Next
    • 3 Stars >
      • Ain't Them Bodies Saints
      • American Hustle
      • The Company You Keep
      • Dead Man Down
      • Deceptive Practice: The Mysteries and Mentors of Ricky Jay
      • Don Jon
      • The East
      • Ender's Game
      • The Great Gatsby
      • The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
      • The Invisible Woman
      • Iron Man 3
      • Labor Day
      • LUV
      • Man of Steel
      • No
      • Oblivion
      • Pacific Rim
      • The Place Beyond the Pines
      • Saving Mr. Banks
      • The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
      • Side Effects
      • Star Trek Into Darkness
      • Thanks for Sharing
      • Thor: The Dark World
      • Tim's Vermeer
      • Upside Down
      • Warm Bodies
      • World War Z
      • The World's End
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • Beautiful Creatures
      • Beyond the Hills
      • The Book Thief
      • Carrie
      • Emperor
      • Fast & Furious 6
      • Gloria
      • The Iceman
      • In a World...
      • Love Is All You Need
      • Mama
      • Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom
      • Nebraska
      • Oldboy
      • Olympus Has Fallen
      • Prisoners
      • The Reluctant Fundamentalist
      • Rush
      • Snitch
      • This Is the End
      • Trance
    • 2 Stars >
      • Byzantium
      • The Counselor
      • Disconnect
      • G.I. Joe: Retaliation
      • Gangster Squad
      • Grudge Match
      • Jack the Giant Slayer
      • Machete Kills
      • Now You See Me
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • Drinking Buddies
      • The Family
      • Girl Most Likely
      • Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters
      • The Incredible Burt Wonderstone
      • The Lone Ranger
      • Parker
    • 1 Star >
      • The Hangover Part III
      • A Haunted House
      • John Dies at the End
      • The Last Stand
      • Oz the Great and Powerful
      • Spring Breakers
    • 0.5 Stars >
      • Escape from Tomorrow
      • Evil Dead
      • A Good Day to Die Hard
  • 2012 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • Argo
      • Bernie
      • Cloud Atlas
      • Django Unchained
      • Lincoln
      • Take this Waltz
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • 5 Broken Cameras
      • Amour
      • Arbitrage
      • Chronicle
      • Looper
      • Moonrise Kingdom
      • The Perks of Being a Wallflower
      • The Queen of Versailles
      • The Raid: Redemption
      • Skyfall
      • The Woman in the Fifth
    • 3 Stars >
      • Act of Valor
      • American Reunion
      • Anna Karenina
      • The Avengers
      • Beasts of the Southern Wild
      • Celeste & Jesse Forever
      • The Dark Knight Rises
      • Frankenweenie
      • Haywire
      • Hitchcock
      • The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
      • The Master
      • Not Fade Away
      • Oslo, August 31st
      • The Other Dream Team
      • The Sessions
      • Seven Psychopaths
      • Silver Linings Playbook
      • Sleepwalk With Me
      • To Rome with Love
      • Your Sister's Sister
      • Zero Dark Thirty
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • The Amazing Spider-Man
      • Farewell, My Queen
      • The Hunger Games
      • The Oranges
      • Robot & Frank
      • Safe House
      • Safety Not Guaranteed
    • 2 Stars >
      • The Deep Blue Sea
      • Salmon Fishing in the Yemen
      • Taken 2
      • The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2
    • 1.5 Stars >
      • The Bourne Legacy
      • Damsels in Distress
      • Lockout
      • Underworld: Awakening
      • Wrath of the Titans
    • 1 Star >
      • 2 Days in New York
  • 2011 Films
    • 4 Stars >
      • Another Earth
      • The Artist
      • Hugo
      • Midnight in Paris
    • 3.5 Stars >
      • 50/50
      • The Devil's Double
      • Drive
      • The Hedgehog
      • The Help
      • The Ides of March
      • J. Edgar
      • The Mill and the Cross
      • My Afternoons with Margueritte
      • My Week with Marilyn
      • Mysteries of Lisbon
      • The Skin I Live In
      • Super 8
      • Young Adult
    • 3 Stars >
      • Albert Nobbs
      • Anonymous
      • Attack the Block
      • Bellflower
      • Circumstance
      • Colombiana
      • The Future
      • Happy, Happy
      • Incendies
      • Jane Eyre
      • Limitless
      • Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol
      • Moneyball
      • The Names of Love
      • Page One: Inside the New York Times
      • Pianomania
      • Queen to Play
      • Rise of the Planet of the Apes
      • Senna
      • Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
      • Tower Heist
      • The Trip
      • Undefeated
      • A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas
      • The Way
      • The Whistleblower
    • 2.5 Stars >
      • Captain America: The First Avenger
      • Conan O'Brien Can't Stop
      • Crazy, Stupid, Love
      • Griff the Invisible
      • The Guard
      • Hanna
      • The Interrupters
      • The Iron Lady
      • Killer Elite
      • Love Crime
      • The Man Nobody Knew: In Search of My Father, CIA Spymaster William Colby
      • Margin Call
      • The Tree of Life
      • The Turin Horse
    • 2 Stars >
      • Bad Teacher
      • Blackthorn
      • Cowboys & Aliens
      • The Debt
      • The Descendants
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Eating Animals

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Directed by: Christopher Dillon Quinn
Written by: Christopher Dillon Quinn - Based on the book by Jonathan Safran Foer
Narrated by: Natalie Portman
Documentary - 94 min          Reviewed by Charlie Juhl on 20 June 2018


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Eating Animals launches with on-screen text saying the meat we eat comes 99% of the time from factory farms and 1% from the local farmer.  There are a whole textbook of facts in this documentary based on Jonathan Safran Foer’s eponymous book.  Turkeys can’t have sex anymore; their mutated bodies are too big.  They are all artificially insiminated now.  80% of the drugs produced by pharmaceutical companies go to the factory farms which is why superbugs are emerging resistant to even our most advanced anti-bacterials.  Eating Animals is a factual horror movie.  I tried vegetarianism in college because I saw videos of animal torture like the ones which will nauseate you here, but there is only so much cheese pizza a body can absorb before it starts breaking down.  Now that I enjoy somewhat of a disposable income, perhaps it’s time to give being vegetarian another shot.

Eating Animals is not dogmatic.  It does not claim vegetarians and vegans are superior to meat eaters.  However, it does say meat eaters are lied to about where the meat comes from.  If people witnessed firsthand the filth and torture the animals experience before they wind up as a McNugget, the system would change.  Here’s an eyebrow-raising fact - 50% of the ongoing climate change warming the planet and melting the poles are from raising animals for food.  Eating Animals will affect those brave enough to watch.  Most likely, the audience is already well aware of the problem and the malicious intent of Big Agriculture and the lobbyists to ensure nothing changes.

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I read Jonathan Safran Foer’s first novel, Everything is Illuminated, in college.  It is phenomenal.  His second novel, Extremely Loud and Incredible Close, was engaging, but less expansive than his first effort.  Director Christopher Dillon Quinn opted to adapt Foer’s non-fiction book about the danger of factory farms and enlisted impressive help.  Natalie Portman is both a producer and the narrator.  Portman’s voice is calm, borderline soothing, as she shows us what a hog pond is and how hundreds of hog ponds in eastern North Carolina are destroying lakes and poisoning the groundwater.  The entire concept of a pink hog pond and the business model of Tyson Foods are so absurd, perhaps the narrator should be Gilbert Gottfried.

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There is no such thing as the independent, rural farmer anymore.  He is a myth.  Tyson Foods centrally owns and manages the meat food chain and put all the risk on the farmer.  They divide the rural community against one another by pitting them in competition.  The winners get bonuses.  These bonuses come from cutting the pay of the bottom; “it is peasants serving the will of corporations.”  Nobody shares information anymore and this isolation and paranoia destroys communities.  Thinking about blowing the whistle?  You will lose.  Lobbyists line the pockets of state legislatures to procure Ag-Gag laws.  It is now a felony in 30 states to film and/or take pictures of slaughterhouse horror. ​

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The entire enterprise is so depressing it is challenging to grasp at the slivers of hope Quinn offers.  Some farmers quit in disgust.  Innovative plant technology can produce food which tastes exactly like meat.  These good feelings last all of a few seconds before the next video pummels us with a baby pig getting slammed into a concrete wall or a forklift shoving a screaming cow.  What the hell is wrong with people?  The USDA is supposed to be looking out for us, the citizens.  Instead, Quinn proves they look out for industry.  The FBI will accuse you of eco-terrorism if your try and film and the cow who was raped to death for ‘scientific’ purposes.  Eating Animals is important.  It has a message which must be told as loud as possible.  But I understand if you want nothing to do with it.  Ignorance is far more palatable. ​

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