Central Intelligence
Directed by: Rawson Marshall Thurber
Written by: Ike Barinholtz & David Stassen and Rawson Marshall Thurber
Starring: Dwayne Johnson, Kevin Hart, Amy Ryan, Danielle Nicolet, Aaron Paul, Ryan Hansen, Jason Bateman
Comedy/Crime - 114 min Reviewed by Charlie Juhl on 15 June 2016
Written by: Ike Barinholtz & David Stassen and Rawson Marshall Thurber
Starring: Dwayne Johnson, Kevin Hart, Amy Ryan, Danielle Nicolet, Aaron Paul, Ryan Hansen, Jason Bateman
Comedy/Crime - 114 min Reviewed by Charlie Juhl on 15 June 2016

When you hear a movie will have actors playing against type, it is usually a comedian going dramatic, think Adam Sandler in Reign Over Me or Jim Carrey in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. On the other hand, comedies sometimes reach the next level when an unexpected star gets the laughs, see Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder. The gimmick to get you to see Central Intelligence is habitual goofball Kevin Hart plays the straight man while action hero, no-nonsense Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson plays the fool. This Grosse Pointe Blank-Lite high school reunion action thriller takes a very long time to get going and stays there. It wants to you to laugh at the absurdity of The Rock in a unicorn T-shirt and a fanny pack and wraps itself up in an anti-bullying message, but Central Intelligence is firmly flat.
Director Rawson Marshall Thurber has directed two very strong comedies in the past 12 years; 2004’s Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story and 2013’s We’re the Millers. Unfortunately, the streak ends here. Written by some of the creative forces behind the TV series The Mindy Project, Central Intelligence lacks the sharp wit of We’re the Millers and the absurd hilarity of Dodgeball. We get it; The Rock is a very big human being. Putting him in tight pajamas that rip when he turns over may only get a laugh from a 10 year-old who has never seen Chris Farley’s “fat man in a little coat” joke before.
Director Rawson Marshall Thurber has directed two very strong comedies in the past 12 years; 2004’s Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story and 2013’s We’re the Millers. Unfortunately, the streak ends here. Written by some of the creative forces behind the TV series The Mindy Project, Central Intelligence lacks the sharp wit of We’re the Millers and the absurd hilarity of Dodgeball. We get it; The Rock is a very big human being. Putting him in tight pajamas that rip when he turns over may only get a laugh from a 10 year-old who has never seen Chris Farley’s “fat man in a little coat” joke before.

Starting off with a bang, we can feel we’re in the mid-90’s when En Vogue fills the speakers. It’s a high school pep rally and Calvin Joyner (Hart, Ride Along 2), student body President, Homecoming king, track team captain, and and most popular guy in school is holding court with the microphone. Suddenly, much maligned and abused fat kid with braces, Robbie Weirdick (Johnson, San Andreas), is thrown into the gym completely nude for what will be the worst moment of his life. Only Calvin refrains from laughing and even offers Robbie his letterman’s jacket to cover up with.

Fast forward 20 years and Calvin is stuck. He was supposed to experience the world and accomplish amazing things; he was voted most likely to succeed of course, but Calvin peaked in high school. Toiling away as a mid-grade accountant in an interior office, Calvin is depressed. He married the prettiest girl in school, Maggie (Danielle Nicolet), who is now professionally ahead of Calvin, and the marriage is on the rocks due to Calvin’s feelings of underperformance and lack of achievement.

All of a sudden, Bob Stone wants to have drinks. Stone is the new Robbie Weirdick, a mountain of a man who genuinely hero worships Calvin. Bob never forgot what Calvin did for him and cannot stop smiling in his presence. Driving a wedge into the pleasant reunion is the fact that Bob is on the run from the CIA trying to prove his innocence and track down some stolen satellite codes at the same time. Amy Ryan (Louder Than Bombs) shows up as an agent trying to capture Bob and enlists Calvin’s help to try and bring him in.

Who do we trust? Calvin and the audience want to trust Bob; he comes off as thoroughly trustworthy but Thurber introduces a deceptive fog into the situation. There are side glances, furrowed brows, and misleading cues. Is Bob all he says he is? How can someone who still dreams he was Molly Ringwald in Sixteen Candles be a bad guy? Bob talks like an open book while Calvin is the standoffish grump, but it’s only a suspense tactic while the scenes meander along and Kevin Hart falls into his standard scream where he screeches every line when he gets upset.

Central Intelligence is perplexingly tedious. Thurber spends a surprising amount of time in one-on-one scenes between Hart and Johnson where they just walk and talk. They stroll through memory lane back at the high school, they chit chat while on the run from the CIA, they even act out a full therapy session in front of Maggie when Bob must pretend to be their marriage counselor. Back to the 10 year-old; he will laugh when Hart curls up in The Rock’s lap to act out how to cuddle, but nobody else will. There is nothing new here and while it is no shock to see to Hart and The Rock show up in a another lazy film, it’s a shame a director with such a strong comedic pedigree stumbled so badly.
Comment Box is loading comments...